Tuesday, January 10, 2012

A Peek into Djenrye

Hi my friends! I hope everyone had a wonderful new year and that so far this year has been good to you. I really feel great about this new year because I will have my book done this year and ready for the professional edits and submissions to agents and publishers. I am very excited about it! For once there is light at the end of the very, very long tunnel! I thought I would give you a peek into Djenrye today. It is just a small peek, but you will see that it is an ancient world, full of possibilities.

Please feel free to critique and let me know what you think, it means a lot to me to hear from you! Also, one more thing, the contest is moving to February. Lizzie cannot be a guest until then. Life has been busy for her, just as it has for the rest of us. I guess we won't have a contest this month, but that's okay, we have other months ahead.

Please comment and let me know if you like it!

That night she dreamed of a city high on a cliff. She was standing on the adjacent mountain side and the sun was rising behind her, illuminating the details of the scene before her. The entrance to the city was marked by tall columns, like those one would see in an ancient Greek temple. Between the columns in the square was a giant round orb of a polished gold, supported by what looked like claws from an animal, holding it up to the heavens. The entire city was nestled in a forest, a waterfall cascaded off the rocks next to what looked to be a temple on that stood like a sentinel overlooking the city.
Her vision moved down to the bottom of the bluff, where a river churned white by rapids roared through the canyon. She gazed past the metropolis at valleys and meadows and majestic mountains with snow caps and unforgiving summits. Looking back at the entrance, the orb gleamed with different colors, blue, purple, yellow and pink as the sun’s rays moved across the surface. The surreal beauty calmed her with its radiance.  

Have a wonderful day all!

Love, Lisa



  2. Try deleting 'one would see'... does it read better? Also, try changing behind her and before her in the same sentence... see what you think.

  3. thanks everyone, and thank you Marilyn! It is always good to get critique from fellow writers!

  4. oh, and thank you Gary fro signing up, I really appreciate it!